The Morning After
Game night was back in full force yesterday. The beer was flowing and poker was the game for the packed full house. We had a special guest coming straight out of Katrina by way of Washington DC--Fong, aka Thong, aka All Up in dat Ass. Actually, this guy was stealing my thunder. I was supposed to the be only asian guy there, quota=limit 1 (because I like to explain myself in Math). But not only was he there and asian, he had more product in his hair than I did. An obvious sign of superiority in the asian culture. WTF. Asshole. Whatever. He did like 0 beer bongs, spoke with hint of British accent, and took the "messy look" hair style over the top with too much gel--yes, there is such a thing. How much gayer can you get. Oh yeah, he had contacts in his eyes which made them blue and smelled like baby powder. That's how much gayer.
Fees dominated the poker game the whole night winning an estimated $80, possibly more. That squirmy little shithead. The only time he comes to game night is when we play poker and for some reason he always ends up winning. He doesn't contribute to game night, doesn't bring drinks, and definately does not provide a good vibe. When he took me out of the game with an all in, I tried to act like I didn't care, but I did. Oh, I did. I was like, "You've got balls Fees! You're so good at poker with the guys! Yay!" But what I really wanted to do was shove his little leprechaun ass in the corner and watch him squirm around trying to protect himself in a little ball while I stomp on him over and over again. Then I'd take his money. No, my money bitch.
This almost became a reality, but then girls showed up--normally a very cool thing on game night, but it was a bit different because we had to treat these girls with some respect. Not used to that. Ladies first on the beer bong... but they politely declined.
Props from the night go to Tony aka 9cm for throwing back a whopping, and possibly record setting, 10 beer bongs (without one mention of Allie). An amazing feat that could only be topped by... 11 beer bongs. Wow.
Although not props, some mention should be given to Nix aka Meatball, who, despite Brenda, tried to "keep it real" amongst the guys. We saw right through it, but good effort on the flex. Meatball definately did not get sex later that night because of the way he acted in front of the girlfriend, and that deserves some mention. It was a sacrifice. But hey, if you planned ahead, you would have dissolved like 10 sleeping pills in her last drink before you went home. Then deny everything the next morning:
"How should I know why your ass hurts? You said no so I just went to bed, just like you... Moo hahahaha! Moo hahahaha! What?"
Just a little trick from someone who Keeps it Real fo' real. Take lessons son.
Anyways.
HEY! What to start your own blog thread on this page? Then click on "BLOGTHIS!" at the very top of this page next to the search bar. You may have to register if you are not registered already. When the box pops up, you can change the title of your thread where it says title. If you want to add hyperlinks like this, or that email me and I'll show you how.
Mindy's B-Day party tonight at Zellas! Wish her a happy birthday and give her some spanks! Yeah... spanks...
Fees dominated the poker game the whole night winning an estimated $80, possibly more. That squirmy little shithead. The only time he comes to game night is when we play poker and for some reason he always ends up winning. He doesn't contribute to game night, doesn't bring drinks, and definately does not provide a good vibe. When he took me out of the game with an all in, I tried to act like I didn't care, but I did. Oh, I did. I was like, "You've got balls Fees! You're so good at poker with the guys! Yay!" But what I really wanted to do was shove his little leprechaun ass in the corner and watch him squirm around trying to protect himself in a little ball while I stomp on him over and over again. Then I'd take his money. No, my money bitch.
This almost became a reality, but then girls showed up--normally a very cool thing on game night, but it was a bit different because we had to treat these girls with some respect. Not used to that. Ladies first on the beer bong... but they politely declined.
Props from the night go to Tony aka 9cm for throwing back a whopping, and possibly record setting, 10 beer bongs (without one mention of Allie). An amazing feat that could only be topped by... 11 beer bongs. Wow.
Although not props, some mention should be given to Nix aka Meatball, who, despite Brenda, tried to "keep it real" amongst the guys. We saw right through it, but good effort on the flex. Meatball definately did not get sex later that night because of the way he acted in front of the girlfriend, and that deserves some mention. It was a sacrifice. But hey, if you planned ahead, you would have dissolved like 10 sleeping pills in her last drink before you went home. Then deny everything the next morning:
"How should I know why your ass hurts? You said no so I just went to bed, just like you... Moo hahahaha! Moo hahahaha! What?"
Just a little trick from someone who Keeps it Real fo' real. Take lessons son.
Anyways.
HEY! What to start your own blog thread on this page? Then click on "BLOGTHIS!" at the very top of this page next to the search bar. You may have to register if you are not registered already. When the box pops up, you can change the title of your thread where it says title. If you want to add hyperlinks like this, or that email me and I'll show you how.
Mindy's B-Day party tonight at Zellas! Wish her a happy birthday and give her some spanks! Yeah... spanks...
posted by DC at 1:03 PM
1 Comments:
DP you Mongolian whore! You can't have all the good Asian/Irish stereotype/racial jokes to yourself you selfish slant eye prick... all we ask is that you save a few for the rest of us no good potato eating four leaf cover fuckers.
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